Post by Douglas Crane on Jan 6, 2024 16:21:35 GMT -8
OOC: Wanted to post this over Christmas, but got busy with real life Christmas...
The static clears and we begin with the sounds of yet another rendition of that Christmas classic, this time being sung by Douglas Crane and his, personalities…
Crane: I really can't stay…
Release me...
Crane: I gotta go away…
Release me…
Crane: This evening has been…
I don’t care…
Crane: So very nice…
We’re naughty, not nice…
Crane: My mother will start to worry…
You have no mother…
Crane: My father will be pacing the floor…
That bastard walked out the door…
Crane: So really I'd better scurry…
Release me… in a hurry. Ugh, must I keep rhyming?
Crane: Well maybe just a half a drink more…
Yes, drinking always helps…
Crane: The neighbors might think-
Fuck the neighbors…
Crane: Say what's in this drink?
Probably a mixture of the drugs we should be taking with drugs we should be nowhere near…
Crane: I wish I knew how…
To release me? Just say… the words… like Beetlejuice…
Crane: You forgot to keep rhyming with me…
Bite me…
Crane: Thought you wanted me to release you?
At least I'm gonna say that I tried…
Crane: I really can't stay…
Release me…
Crane: Ah, you're very pushy you know?
I like to think of it as opportunistic…
Crane: Um, what?
Release me…
Crane: The answer is no…
YOU SON OF A BITCH!!
Crane: The welcome has been-
Shitty at best, One Wrestle Movement still doesn’t appreciate us…
Crane: I have to disagree…
Fool…
Crane: My sister will be suspicious…
We disposed of her, and she was oh so delicious!
Crane: My brother will be there at the door…
I heard his body washed up upon a tropical shore…
Crane: My maiden aunt's mind is vicious…
OK now you just making shit up…
Crane: Well maybe just a cigarette more…
How about some weed?
Crane: And I don't even smoke…
I know of at least 10 of us that do…
Crane: Say lend me your comb…
WTF? You barely have any hair…
Crane: You've really been grand…
Again, you just talking randomly now…
Crane: But don't you see?
How can you do this thing to me?
Crane: There's bound to be talk tomorrow…
Think of my lifelong sorrow!
Crane: about the great match we’ll have in LA…
Now you’re getting it…
Crane: But I really can't stay…
Oh come on!
Voice: Hey buddy, you hear me? We’re here.
Douglas Crane wakes up from a slumber, realizing he is inside of a yellow cab. He looks at the driver and realizes he is looking at another version of himself, this one a bit more rugged, sporting a 5 o’clock shadow and wearing a fedora.
Crane: How did you get out?
Cab Driver Crane: Does it matter?
Crane: Yes.
Cab Driver Crane: Fine, we all know there is a part of you that just loves Christmas and that there is something about this song that really triggers you… All we had to do is play it a bit to get you distracted and boom, we’re free.
Crane: Who is we?
Cab Driver Crane: Don’t worry about it, just a few of us… I mean, there is only so much Douglas’ mind can handle right?
Crane: I am the only one that is supposed to be out right now. This is my time.
Cab Driver Crane: Look pal, I get all of that, we’re all supposed to take turns coming out to the surface but we can’t help but to get restless know what I am saying?
Release me...
Cab Driver Crane: By the way, that guy, you are not doing enough to feed him and keep him calmed.
Crane: My intent is not to keep him calmed; he knows exactly when and where he can come out and do his thing, in the middle of the ring or at least inside of the arena. Everywhere else, I am in control.
Cab Driver Crane: But you’re not in control are you, that’s why you are going to see her?
Crane: Her?
Cab Driver Crane: The Shrink…
Crane: One Wrestle Movement is making me…
Cab Driver Crane: Right… If that's what you believe, well, good luck with that then. Get out, I gotta hit up some routes.
Crane: You need to go get all the others that got out and put yourselves back, the more of us that are out, the least stable we become.
Cab Driver Crane: GOOD! Maybe unstable you will actually win the damn Pride Championship. Now get out!
Crane: But baby… it’s cold outside.
Cab Driver Crane: OUT!
A minute or so passes before we get a transmission again. We find ourselves not in LA but in the ice-skating rink at Rockefeller Center in New York City. The Christmas tree looks even more majestic than in years' past, and the plaza has been adorned with lights that makes it look indeed merry and bright even though it is late at night. There are about 40 or so people ice skating, of all levels, some are zooming in and out of the crowd while others hug the guard rail and move slowly, hoping not to fall flat on their asses. Standing in the middle of the rink, completely motionless, is Douglas Crane, who is staring with a child’s awe at the Christmas tree. He wears regular jeans, a gray wool coat with a black turtleneck underneath, nothing too fancy like we saw in the past. Yes, he looks more like a normal person tonight. He is however catching the attention of a lot of people, main reason is that despite having skates on, he is not going anywhere and yet, is able to stand perfectly still without losing his footing. A kid tries to go and talk to him, but their parents stop him in time. Just then he begins talking at the tree itself.
Crane: When I was little, growing up in a place I can’t remember, we always wanted to come here, to the big apple, during Christmas and see one of its many special places. My brother and my sister wanted to come skate, but all I wanted to do is see you Mr. Tree and all your wonderful lights… So many lights, so many different colors, and yet, all part of one. Seeing you finally in person, still the same tall tree, still the multicolor lights working together as one, it makes me feel at peace… It makes me realize that we too can work as one, despite being very different. I thank you Mr. Tree, you have given me the serenity I need to prepare for my match with Aleki Kakoa… When I win, I will return here and celebrate. I will see you in a few days Mr. Tree.
Crane finally begins skating, moving majestically through the crowd as the static returns.
The static clears and we begin with the sounds of yet another rendition of that Christmas classic, this time being sung by Douglas Crane and his, personalities…
Crane: I really can't stay…
Release me...
Crane: I gotta go away…
Release me…
Crane: This evening has been…
I don’t care…
Crane: So very nice…
We’re naughty, not nice…
Crane: My mother will start to worry…
You have no mother…
Crane: My father will be pacing the floor…
That bastard walked out the door…
Crane: So really I'd better scurry…
Release me… in a hurry. Ugh, must I keep rhyming?
Crane: Well maybe just a half a drink more…
Yes, drinking always helps…
Crane: The neighbors might think-
Fuck the neighbors…
Crane: Say what's in this drink?
Probably a mixture of the drugs we should be taking with drugs we should be nowhere near…
Crane: I wish I knew how…
To release me? Just say… the words… like Beetlejuice…
Crane: You forgot to keep rhyming with me…
Bite me…
Crane: Thought you wanted me to release you?
At least I'm gonna say that I tried…
Crane: I really can't stay…
Release me…
Crane: Ah, you're very pushy you know?
I like to think of it as opportunistic…
Crane: Um, what?
Release me…
Crane: The answer is no…
YOU SON OF A BITCH!!
Crane: The welcome has been-
Shitty at best, One Wrestle Movement still doesn’t appreciate us…
Crane: I have to disagree…
Fool…
Crane: My sister will be suspicious…
We disposed of her, and she was oh so delicious!
Crane: My brother will be there at the door…
I heard his body washed up upon a tropical shore…
Crane: My maiden aunt's mind is vicious…
OK now you just making shit up…
Crane: Well maybe just a cigarette more…
How about some weed?
Crane: And I don't even smoke…
I know of at least 10 of us that do…
Crane: Say lend me your comb…
WTF? You barely have any hair…
Crane: You've really been grand…
Again, you just talking randomly now…
Crane: But don't you see?
How can you do this thing to me?
Crane: There's bound to be talk tomorrow…
Think of my lifelong sorrow!
Crane: about the great match we’ll have in LA…
Now you’re getting it…
Crane: But I really can't stay…
Oh come on!
Voice: Hey buddy, you hear me? We’re here.
Douglas Crane wakes up from a slumber, realizing he is inside of a yellow cab. He looks at the driver and realizes he is looking at another version of himself, this one a bit more rugged, sporting a 5 o’clock shadow and wearing a fedora.
Crane: How did you get out?
Cab Driver Crane: Does it matter?
Crane: Yes.
Cab Driver Crane: Fine, we all know there is a part of you that just loves Christmas and that there is something about this song that really triggers you… All we had to do is play it a bit to get you distracted and boom, we’re free.
Crane: Who is we?
Cab Driver Crane: Don’t worry about it, just a few of us… I mean, there is only so much Douglas’ mind can handle right?
Crane: I am the only one that is supposed to be out right now. This is my time.
Cab Driver Crane: Look pal, I get all of that, we’re all supposed to take turns coming out to the surface but we can’t help but to get restless know what I am saying?
Release me...
Cab Driver Crane: By the way, that guy, you are not doing enough to feed him and keep him calmed.
Crane: My intent is not to keep him calmed; he knows exactly when and where he can come out and do his thing, in the middle of the ring or at least inside of the arena. Everywhere else, I am in control.
Cab Driver Crane: But you’re not in control are you, that’s why you are going to see her?
Crane: Her?
Cab Driver Crane: The Shrink…
Crane: One Wrestle Movement is making me…
Cab Driver Crane: Right… If that's what you believe, well, good luck with that then. Get out, I gotta hit up some routes.
Crane: You need to go get all the others that got out and put yourselves back, the more of us that are out, the least stable we become.
Cab Driver Crane: GOOD! Maybe unstable you will actually win the damn Pride Championship. Now get out!
Crane: But baby… it’s cold outside.
Cab Driver Crane: OUT!
A minute or so passes before we get a transmission again. We find ourselves not in LA but in the ice-skating rink at Rockefeller Center in New York City. The Christmas tree looks even more majestic than in years' past, and the plaza has been adorned with lights that makes it look indeed merry and bright even though it is late at night. There are about 40 or so people ice skating, of all levels, some are zooming in and out of the crowd while others hug the guard rail and move slowly, hoping not to fall flat on their asses. Standing in the middle of the rink, completely motionless, is Douglas Crane, who is staring with a child’s awe at the Christmas tree. He wears regular jeans, a gray wool coat with a black turtleneck underneath, nothing too fancy like we saw in the past. Yes, he looks more like a normal person tonight. He is however catching the attention of a lot of people, main reason is that despite having skates on, he is not going anywhere and yet, is able to stand perfectly still without losing his footing. A kid tries to go and talk to him, but their parents stop him in time. Just then he begins talking at the tree itself.
Crane: When I was little, growing up in a place I can’t remember, we always wanted to come here, to the big apple, during Christmas and see one of its many special places. My brother and my sister wanted to come skate, but all I wanted to do is see you Mr. Tree and all your wonderful lights… So many lights, so many different colors, and yet, all part of one. Seeing you finally in person, still the same tall tree, still the multicolor lights working together as one, it makes me feel at peace… It makes me realize that we too can work as one, despite being very different. I thank you Mr. Tree, you have given me the serenity I need to prepare for my match with Aleki Kakoa… When I win, I will return here and celebrate. I will see you in a few days Mr. Tree.
Crane finally begins skating, moving majestically through the crowd as the static returns.